Looking out of my window (on the 25th floor of the third largest builiding in New Zealand, I might add) I can see right into the penthouse suite of the Auckland Centra Hotel. Guests sometimes forget that, despite being so high up, they’re not completely invisible to the outside world and, apparantly, oblivious undressers often expose more than they’re aware.

On Friday, however, one group of people went a rather gruesome step further: a naked, fat, middle-aged woman (why are they never attractive?) decided to bounce around on her penthouse balcony waving to us with her jugs flying. Meanhile her friends seemed to be making porn films in the bedroom, pressing themselves up to the glass. Brightened up my Friday afternoon.